Letting Go of the ‘Shoulds’ and Doing YOU

For years, I lived by the ‘shoulds.’

I should be available for my family and friends.
I should say yes to every opportunity.
I should have it all figured out by now.
I should be able to manage everything on my own.

And on and on it went.

Every “should” felt like a rule I had to follow — an unspoken contract between me and the world that determined whether I was doing enough, being enough, proving enough.

I absorbed those expectations from my environment, my upbringing, my workplace, and society at large. They kept me stuck, exhausted, and disconnected from myself.

When I hit burnout in my career, I made a decision: I would stop following the script of shoulds.

So I started asking different questions:

What do I actually want?
What feels right for me, beyond what’s expected?
What would happen if I stopped listening to everyone else and trusted my own instincts?

Letting go of the “shoulds” isn’t easy. It feels uncomfortable. It forces you to face the fear that without them, you might disappoint people, miss opportunities, or fall short.

But here’s what I’ve learned — and what I help my clients see:

You experience real freedom when you stop living by rules that were never meant for you.

Instead of carrying what you “should” do, you choose what you want to do.

And when you choose, everything shifts.

You stop chasing approval and start trusting yourself.

For me, I stopped chasing success and started defining it on my own terms. I stopped trying to be everything to everyone and started showing up as myself.

So I’ll ask you:

What’s one “should” you’re ready to let go of today?