Letting Go of the ‘Shoulds’ and Doing YOU

For years, I lived by the ‘shoulds.’

I should be available for my family and friends. I should say yes to every opportunity. I should have it all figured out by now. I should be able to manage everything on my own.

And on and on it went.

Every ‘should’ felt like a rule I had to follow — an unspoken contract between me and the world that determined whether I was doing enough, being enough, proving enough.

They were expectations I had absorbed from my environment, my upbringing, my workplace, and society at large. They were keeping me stuck, exhausted, and disconnected from myself.

It wasn’t until I hit a point of burn out in my career where I decided I would no longer follow the script of shoulds.

So I started asking different questions:

• What do I actually want?
• What feels right for me, beyond what’s expected?
• What if I let go of listening to others and just trusted my own instincts?

Letting go of the ‘shoulds’ isn’t easy. It’s uncomfortable. It means facing the fear that without them, you might disappoint people, miss opportunities, or not measure up. But what I’ve learned — and what I help my clients see — is that true freedom comes when you stop living by rules that were never meant for you.

Instead of being weighed down by what you ‘should’ do, you get to decide what you want to do. And when you do, you gain so much freedom and happiness.

You stop chasing approval and start trusting yourself. For me, I stopped chasing success and created it on my own terms. I stopped trying to be everything to everyone and started being true to ME.

So, what’s one ‘should’ you’re ready to let go of today?